graduation, reflection, conviction, and maybe some deep hope....
As of today, we have completed Josiah's preschool graduation a week ago, which made me cry like a baby.....and Jeremiah's 8th grade graduation this week Wednesday, which made me cry a little bit, and Claire's high school graduation which made me cry the least. My heart is so full of joy and humble gratitude that I get to be the mom who does life with these 5 kids. All of their successes and failures and struggles and victories and milestones and hiccups are written like a song in my heart. Things like graduations get attention and pictures and even gifts from friends and family.....
We put time and focus and money and effort into making sure Claire's graduation party was great and it was so so great. We didn't put much time into Jeremiah's other than insisting that everyone be present for it, including Isaac who missed a baseball game to attend. We went to my moms and had cupcakes and drinks and visited for a bit and then took him to his after hours party. Poor Josiah got the least amount of time and focus and money and effort. Everyone was committed to be somewhere else except me. Josiah and I went to his preschool graduation and I video taped all the songs and I cried lots of tears because he is my baby.....and he isn't a baby any more. I cried because his birth mom trusted me to raise him right and seeing him on that stage knowing all the words and songs and being a leader and a friend made my heart practically burst open with love for him. I cried because it would have been so great if she could have been there too. I am humbled and grateful that I get to help this little man grow up.
That's the point, I think. Graduation is a pause where we look at things and understand how humbling it is to help someone grow up. This year we paused extra long after preschool....we paused a moment for Precious after second grade. We paused longer for Jeremiah after 8th grade because now he leaves the only school he has ever known and will go to high school in a different town with new friends and new teachers and new expectations. We paused a moment with Isaac today because he took his last exams to finish 10th grade. We continue to pause longer with Claire as she finishes high school. Monday we went to a presentation and heard her give her "capstone" which is a summary of her 4 years of high school. (I cried here too). Seeing her reflect on where she was and how she has changed and matured through her experiences is so impressive. Seeing her embrace the excitement of her future is really inspiring......high school graduation is so great for us.
Claire worked hard to get to her graduation that happened last night. She studied hard. She worked for extra credit. She fought to make sure she got fair grading. she accepted the responsibility of being class officer. She showed up every single day on time for class and respected the dress code and other rules. If we had such a thing at our school, she would have graduated "with honors" because she gets good grades. She didn't get that diploma alone. I thought about this a lot yesterday as I was running around town buying things for the party and hauling things up and down the steps of her party venue and making calls and plans. She didn't do this alone. It seemed effortless for her to get to her graduation day.....because she had help. Ironically, or inspired by the Holy Spirit, the address given said this exact thing. They didn't get there alone. I bet you can hear the message somewhere on the Unity Christian High School web page. If you can't find it.....ask Roger (not me!)
I visit young mothers in our community. That is my job. I visit them and I get to know their story and I learn what their goals are and who they have to help them and what barriers stand in their way. I assess their community to see what is helpful and what is harmful to their ability to parent in a positive way. I am a community health nurse and my life's work is to help create and maintain healthy families. Lots of the young mothers I visit did not complete high school. Let that sink in for a moment. What was fairly effortless for my daughter and everyone she had a party with and most of the people she went across the stage with to receive diplomas.....is essentially impossible for young mothers I can count on my fingers and name. I visit them regularly.
These young mothers didn't finish because the didn't have support, or they got into trouble, or they didn't have a strong father figure. They didn't finish because they got pregnant and didn't have daycare. They didn't finish because their family needed to pay bills so they had to quit school and go work in a factory full time to help buy food and pay rent. They didn't finish because no one was home to make sure they woke up when they slept through the alarm. They didn't finish because they overslept, didn't have a ride (most often request from me in community....can you give me a ride to school? yes. right here in northwest Iowa) These young mother wanted to finish high school too. When I ask them about their education, which is required in my assessment, if they didn't finish high school they duck their head, or avert their eyes. It's hard to make eye contact when you feel ashamed. Or sad. Or defeated. Everyone wants to finish high school. Everyone wants that diploma or GED that says they are worthy to go on to college, or to be promoted to manager, or to be employable. Everyone. Everyone wants their status to matter and to be worth something.
Young mamas with little kids....please hear this. Read to your children. Read. To. Your. Children. Take them to the library. Enroll in a Kinder-Music class if you can. If you cannot afford it please talk to me. I know people who value this and will pay for it. Help your kids be excited for school. Volunteer in your child's school. Wash the dishes. Go on the field trips. Email the teachers. Find a job that lets you be excused if your child misses the bus and needs a ride to school. If your job doesn't allow it please talk to me. I will find you a person to be your surrogate. Children need to know that it is not their responsibility to wake up, eat breakfast, get to school on time and get home safely. Children need adults to do this. If you don't have adults to help you.....talk to me.
Older adults......be the people that step up. Be the people that help these young mamas with their school age kids. Be a mentor. Offer to give rides. Offer to do something...anything.....to help a child journey through education and one day walk that stage and receive that diploma. Be there to take the damn photo for them.....some kids don't have anyone to take the photo even.
Lets do better. Lets do more than making sure our own kids can graduate (effortlessly) and move on into adulthood. Lets be the church, shall we? Lets look past our own yard and curb and street and wonder who could use a bit of help to get to where we are (effortlessly).
I'm gonna do it, with or without help. If you want to help, know that you will be blessed bigger than your own blessings can give......and maybe your own kiddos will grow up to think bigger too. That's the deep hope I maintain.
We put time and focus and money and effort into making sure Claire's graduation party was great and it was so so great. We didn't put much time into Jeremiah's other than insisting that everyone be present for it, including Isaac who missed a baseball game to attend. We went to my moms and had cupcakes and drinks and visited for a bit and then took him to his after hours party. Poor Josiah got the least amount of time and focus and money and effort. Everyone was committed to be somewhere else except me. Josiah and I went to his preschool graduation and I video taped all the songs and I cried lots of tears because he is my baby.....and he isn't a baby any more. I cried because his birth mom trusted me to raise him right and seeing him on that stage knowing all the words and songs and being a leader and a friend made my heart practically burst open with love for him. I cried because it would have been so great if she could have been there too. I am humbled and grateful that I get to help this little man grow up.
That's the point, I think. Graduation is a pause where we look at things and understand how humbling it is to help someone grow up. This year we paused extra long after preschool....we paused a moment for Precious after second grade. We paused longer for Jeremiah after 8th grade because now he leaves the only school he has ever known and will go to high school in a different town with new friends and new teachers and new expectations. We paused a moment with Isaac today because he took his last exams to finish 10th grade. We continue to pause longer with Claire as she finishes high school. Monday we went to a presentation and heard her give her "capstone" which is a summary of her 4 years of high school. (I cried here too). Seeing her reflect on where she was and how she has changed and matured through her experiences is so impressive. Seeing her embrace the excitement of her future is really inspiring......high school graduation is so great for us.
Claire worked hard to get to her graduation that happened last night. She studied hard. She worked for extra credit. She fought to make sure she got fair grading. she accepted the responsibility of being class officer. She showed up every single day on time for class and respected the dress code and other rules. If we had such a thing at our school, she would have graduated "with honors" because she gets good grades. She didn't get that diploma alone. I thought about this a lot yesterday as I was running around town buying things for the party and hauling things up and down the steps of her party venue and making calls and plans. She didn't do this alone. It seemed effortless for her to get to her graduation day.....because she had help. Ironically, or inspired by the Holy Spirit, the address given said this exact thing. They didn't get there alone. I bet you can hear the message somewhere on the Unity Christian High School web page. If you can't find it.....ask Roger (not me!)
I visit young mothers in our community. That is my job. I visit them and I get to know their story and I learn what their goals are and who they have to help them and what barriers stand in their way. I assess their community to see what is helpful and what is harmful to their ability to parent in a positive way. I am a community health nurse and my life's work is to help create and maintain healthy families. Lots of the young mothers I visit did not complete high school. Let that sink in for a moment. What was fairly effortless for my daughter and everyone she had a party with and most of the people she went across the stage with to receive diplomas.....is essentially impossible for young mothers I can count on my fingers and name. I visit them regularly.
These young mothers didn't finish because the didn't have support, or they got into trouble, or they didn't have a strong father figure. They didn't finish because they got pregnant and didn't have daycare. They didn't finish because their family needed to pay bills so they had to quit school and go work in a factory full time to help buy food and pay rent. They didn't finish because no one was home to make sure they woke up when they slept through the alarm. They didn't finish because they overslept, didn't have a ride (most often request from me in community....can you give me a ride to school? yes. right here in northwest Iowa) These young mother wanted to finish high school too. When I ask them about their education, which is required in my assessment, if they didn't finish high school they duck their head, or avert their eyes. It's hard to make eye contact when you feel ashamed. Or sad. Or defeated. Everyone wants to finish high school. Everyone wants that diploma or GED that says they are worthy to go on to college, or to be promoted to manager, or to be employable. Everyone. Everyone wants their status to matter and to be worth something.
Young mamas with little kids....please hear this. Read to your children. Read. To. Your. Children. Take them to the library. Enroll in a Kinder-Music class if you can. If you cannot afford it please talk to me. I know people who value this and will pay for it. Help your kids be excited for school. Volunteer in your child's school. Wash the dishes. Go on the field trips. Email the teachers. Find a job that lets you be excused if your child misses the bus and needs a ride to school. If your job doesn't allow it please talk to me. I will find you a person to be your surrogate. Children need to know that it is not their responsibility to wake up, eat breakfast, get to school on time and get home safely. Children need adults to do this. If you don't have adults to help you.....talk to me.
Older adults......be the people that step up. Be the people that help these young mamas with their school age kids. Be a mentor. Offer to give rides. Offer to do something...anything.....to help a child journey through education and one day walk that stage and receive that diploma. Be there to take the damn photo for them.....some kids don't have anyone to take the photo even.
Lets do better. Lets do more than making sure our own kids can graduate (effortlessly) and move on into adulthood. Lets be the church, shall we? Lets look past our own yard and curb and street and wonder who could use a bit of help to get to where we are (effortlessly).
I'm gonna do it, with or without help. If you want to help, know that you will be blessed bigger than your own blessings can give......and maybe your own kiddos will grow up to think bigger too. That's the deep hope I maintain.
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