He is Greater.....John 3:30 says He must become greater, I must become less"

This morning I woke up and Roger told me something.  He said he got up in the night and smelled something hot, like burning rubber.  He went looking and discovered an extension cord in the  basement that was sitting in water near our laundry dryer.  It had rained hard last night.  He tried to unplug it and got shocked.  He did eventually get it unplugged but it smoked and was hot.  We could have had an electrical fire here at 2am last night.  He said "I prayed that we would be safe from the winds and rain, and that no trees or fences would fall...." and I prayed that too....but there was a much bigger threat than trees and fences outside.....God kept us safe.  Check your corners people.  We don't use that extension cord often, only when we iron.  It doesn't rain that hard very often either..... Later in the morning I had to drive to the office to bring some very important documents.  I noticed flooding in the fields a...

I was sitting at a baseball game tonight because that's what we do in this family in June.  We sit at lots and lots of games.  It was hot.  So......hot.  I had my chair parked just where I like it, where I can see the pitcher, the batter, third base and outfield......and other baseball parents were all around me.  We were all hot.  I felt this bead of sweat travel down my spine and I marveled that it could pass all the way down and then it seemed to crawl back up to the middle of my back and slide down again.  It had to be the same bead of sweat.....there was no way they were falling that fast if there were more.  It was so hot.  The high school that my boys chose to go to has a struggling baseball program.  They have excelled in other sports, like football and basketball in recent years so all of the teams we play hate us.  Hate. They want blood and they want it bad......keep in mind that my boys were not on those winning t...

Last week Saturday we were in the thick of it with dance recital weekend.  Thanks to the family who came to share in this special event with us.  We always love dance recital weekend....and since this was Claire's final show it was extra special to have some family here.  On Saturday, we were getting ready to go for the afternoon show.  It had been a crazy week/month/year already.....and I was feeling all the crazy on Saturday morning.  We were exhausted and excited.....and Claire and I were in the bathroom together getting ready.  (we don't have enough bathrooms....2 of them for 7 people poses challenges)....Josiah started in, fussing and whining because he didn't want to go back for the afternoon program and perform the tumbling routine.  I was arguing with him and discussing it with him, while trying to do hair and make up and talk to Claire.  I had just taken my supplements because I am old and American and need things like vitamin D and...

As of today, we have completed Josiah's preschool graduation a week ago, which made me cry like a baby.....and Jeremiah's 8th grade graduation this week Wednesday, which made me cry a little bit, and Claire's high school graduation which made me cry the least.  My heart is so full of joy and humble gratitude that I get to be the mom who does life with these 5 kids.  All of their successes and failures and struggles and victories and milestones and hiccups are written like a song in my heart.  Things like graduations get attention and pictures and even gifts from friends and family..... We put time and focus and money and effort into making sure Claire's graduation party was great and it was so so great.  We didn't put much time into Jeremiah's other than insisting that everyone be present for it, including Isaac who missed a baseball game to attend.  We went to my moms and had cupcakes and drinks and visited for a bit and then took him to his after hours part...

Happy Mother's Day!  It has been a happy day here for me, except that my husband is away on a business trip.  Other than that my 5 sweet children have been here with me and I am enjoying their presence and their love.  A couple of months ago, some of you wrote to me.  I asked  you to share what it means to be a good mother.  The comments that came in are wonderful and true.  My mother's day gift to all of you who read my ramblings is to share them with you all in one place.  What Makes A Good Mama?     Be attentive.  Admit when you are wrong and ask for grace and forgiveness.  Be patient.  Show steadfast love.  Be solid.  Be someone your children can turn to.  Be full of grace.  Show unconditional love.  Be present.  Be self-denying.  Be warm.  (gosh I love this one....for so many reasons.  mid-life flashes included, as well as just being the kind of w...

Birth mom day.  Some of us in adoption world recognize the Saturday before Mother's Day as birth mom day.  We create little rituals that help keep memories alive and honor  birth moms.  With Precious and Josiah, I try to make sure we are talking about birth moms as often as they want to.  The Saturday before Mother's Day we plant a flower in their honor.  As the kids get older, this ritual is getting harder.  It brings up sadness for the kids and sometimes they say they miss their birth mom (even if they don't have actual memories of her) and they do.  I know they do.  They miss the idea that their mom is their only mom.  They miss knowing the mom who created them and gave them life.  They resent me because I am the mom they have now and not their original mom.  (side note....please don't call birth moms "real moms" because what does that make adoptive moms?  fake?  I'm about as real as it gets folks.) Thi...

Mother's Day is one of my favorite holidays.  I say that knowing that for many women, it is their hardest day of the year.  I am hoping to write a few different times over the next days about my thoughts on mothers and how and why to celebrate them.  I can write these thoughts and still respect and honor the hearts of women who are suffering and just trying to endure Mother's Day.  I have grave and deep sympathy for you.  I will pray for all of you, that the heart of God will wash over you with love and peace and a sense of His Faithfulness in the middle of your struggle and heartache.  I will pray.  I promise.  I believe that others will pray as well.  If you have lost a child, if you have not been able to conceive, if you have lost a mother.......I am feeling your hurt as you do Mother's Day.  If you are waiting for a child either through birth or adoption and the wait is long and your heart is weary.....I will pray.  Plea...