Alexander (or me) and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad....day.
4am: "mom...." "What, Precious..." "I was sleeping so hard and I peed the bed." expletive. expletive. double expletive. cry out to Jesus. and some more cussing.....so I got her cleaned up and changed and as she walked to the couch to finish her sleep she said. "oh oh. look. the dogs got in the garbage". sure enough. remains from the past 2 days of food consumption for the family......all over the dining room. so there I was on my hands and knees cleaning up empty containers and wrappers, wondering what our schnoodle would do to digest Guatemalan tortillas....and guacamole.....and leftover chinese......ugh.
Because I was not being gentle or quiet, Josiah woke up too. Oh goody, goody. So get him to the bathroom and tucked into bed again....and he wants me to lay with him because he is three years old and it is 4 am.....so as I am trying to fall back asleep I wonder.....what in the world is that.....smell?
6am: "mom....." What, Jeremiah?" "There is water all over the basement!" Last night I screwed up really bad and shoved lots of leftovers down the garbage disposal in the kitchen sink. Sometime later, the water softener ran and tried to shove about 10 gallons of water through a pipe clogged with leftover ground meat and potatoes and......more. We don't keep that particular part of the home really clean. Ever. Everything on the floor.....was soaked....and dripping in wet, food.....goo.
Morning!
I was already exhausted. Isaac, who has a phone, decided to text dad a "mayday" in Texas. Thanks a lot, buddy. Maybe he felt it was necessary because I went from squeezing my head, shreaking "what do I do? I don't know what to do?!" to........"can I make you an egg before the bus comes buddy?" Roger called and I just started to cry. I'm so tired. I'm six days into single mama which I could maybe handle if I didn't have really heavy and demanding stuff at work, and dogs, and homework, school concerts, shopping, dance class, a teen with a hip injury, bills, and more deadlines for the kids at school as well as at work. Roger called the plumber. I don't know what he said to them but the dude showed up at 8:03am.....which never happens.
Jeremiah had to sprint across 3 lawns to intercept the plumber before he walked into the house to meet......Lexi. J got Lexi in her crate and we made it to school almost on time today. His teacher asked why he was tardy. He explained the plumber, the sprinting, the dog...and she said, "next time bring a note." really? really? should I write the note while I'm driving? I got the kids all moved to their spots and came home and cried a bit longer. Crying helps. So does coffee.
I had to deal with the water in the basement most of the day which was more aweful because of the mess down there. Humbling. Disgusting. Convicting. I made it, though, and did most of the yuck work before I had to leave and then turned it over to Isaac to finish so I could go do some billable work, and then get the kids and go listen to Jeremiah do his strings festival concert. There was standing room only at the concert, at 4pm, with my 2 restless children. I mumbled mostly to myself, "I did not rush over here to stand in the hall of this school and not see this performance. If there were not enough seats then the school should have just bussed them home instead of demanding we come get our kids! I have had...a....day. I am not in the mood." I swear. I swear a dad standing near me heard me and I think he even rolled his eyes at me as he snickered. Oh. Oh. Oh. I would Loooooooove to actually talk to this man. Being all worked up as I am and all. jerk.
This parenting thing. This is a tough gig. It really is. These little people do not deserve to see me fall apart at 4am, or 6 am, or 10 pm.....I should be more able......but I'm not. I am so not. At least not this week. I am in surrender mode tonight.
Roger would like to help but he cannot, since he is still in Texas. He is a good husband and father. It isn't easy to hear your wife sobbing at 7am and want to say sorry and really know none of it is your fault. He said sorry anyway. I don't deserve him. He is beyond what I deserve for sure.
Claire is taking a leadership class and tonight she got to meet with her mentor for the first time. The class requires about 4 meetings with a mentor that demonstrates leadership and together, we chose one of my good friends to ask. My friend said yes. She is one of my very important friends, according to God. They had a great visit. Claire's world just opened up a bit more because she is now a friend to my friend. Hope.....springs eternal.....
Oh wait. Isaac just came up distraught at 10:40pm. His phone is broken. It froze up. He is texting dad in Texas on my phone to report this very big problem for him while I type this post in my bed. And drink wine. And try not to squeeze my head again today.
Mercy.
I find it is mercy that a day is only 24 hours long before we get to start all over again.
Because I was not being gentle or quiet, Josiah woke up too. Oh goody, goody. So get him to the bathroom and tucked into bed again....and he wants me to lay with him because he is three years old and it is 4 am.....so as I am trying to fall back asleep I wonder.....what in the world is that.....smell?
6am: "mom....." What, Jeremiah?" "There is water all over the basement!" Last night I screwed up really bad and shoved lots of leftovers down the garbage disposal in the kitchen sink. Sometime later, the water softener ran and tried to shove about 10 gallons of water through a pipe clogged with leftover ground meat and potatoes and......more. We don't keep that particular part of the home really clean. Ever. Everything on the floor.....was soaked....and dripping in wet, food.....goo.
Morning!
I was already exhausted. Isaac, who has a phone, decided to text dad a "mayday" in Texas. Thanks a lot, buddy. Maybe he felt it was necessary because I went from squeezing my head, shreaking "what do I do? I don't know what to do?!" to........"can I make you an egg before the bus comes buddy?" Roger called and I just started to cry. I'm so tired. I'm six days into single mama which I could maybe handle if I didn't have really heavy and demanding stuff at work, and dogs, and homework, school concerts, shopping, dance class, a teen with a hip injury, bills, and more deadlines for the kids at school as well as at work. Roger called the plumber. I don't know what he said to them but the dude showed up at 8:03am.....which never happens.
Jeremiah had to sprint across 3 lawns to intercept the plumber before he walked into the house to meet......Lexi. J got Lexi in her crate and we made it to school almost on time today. His teacher asked why he was tardy. He explained the plumber, the sprinting, the dog...and she said, "next time bring a note." really? really? should I write the note while I'm driving? I got the kids all moved to their spots and came home and cried a bit longer. Crying helps. So does coffee.
I had to deal with the water in the basement most of the day which was more aweful because of the mess down there. Humbling. Disgusting. Convicting. I made it, though, and did most of the yuck work before I had to leave and then turned it over to Isaac to finish so I could go do some billable work, and then get the kids and go listen to Jeremiah do his strings festival concert. There was standing room only at the concert, at 4pm, with my 2 restless children. I mumbled mostly to myself, "I did not rush over here to stand in the hall of this school and not see this performance. If there were not enough seats then the school should have just bussed them home instead of demanding we come get our kids! I have had...a....day. I am not in the mood." I swear. I swear a dad standing near me heard me and I think he even rolled his eyes at me as he snickered. Oh. Oh. Oh. I would Loooooooove to actually talk to this man. Being all worked up as I am and all. jerk.
This parenting thing. This is a tough gig. It really is. These little people do not deserve to see me fall apart at 4am, or 6 am, or 10 pm.....I should be more able......but I'm not. I am so not. At least not this week. I am in surrender mode tonight.
Roger would like to help but he cannot, since he is still in Texas. He is a good husband and father. It isn't easy to hear your wife sobbing at 7am and want to say sorry and really know none of it is your fault. He said sorry anyway. I don't deserve him. He is beyond what I deserve for sure.
Claire is taking a leadership class and tonight she got to meet with her mentor for the first time. The class requires about 4 meetings with a mentor that demonstrates leadership and together, we chose one of my good friends to ask. My friend said yes. She is one of my very important friends, according to God. They had a great visit. Claire's world just opened up a bit more because she is now a friend to my friend. Hope.....springs eternal.....
Oh wait. Isaac just came up distraught at 10:40pm. His phone is broken. It froze up. He is texting dad in Texas on my phone to report this very big problem for him while I type this post in my bed. And drink wine. And try not to squeeze my head again today.
Mercy.
I find it is mercy that a day is only 24 hours long before we get to start all over again.
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