Number Two

 Isaac Earl was born in the spring of 2002, right after 911.  I was pregnant with him when that happened.  I had a difficult pregnancy with him and there was a threat that he could be lost prenatally the first half of the pregnancy.  At 9 weeks gestation, I went to a church service and knelt at an alter after an alter call....and I was bleeding and the doctors had told me that for now I had a viable fetus but the future was not gauranteed.  I knelt at that alter and I gave him to the Lord.  He was not yet Isaac...he was just a baby I was carrying.  I told God this was his child and asked him if I could please carry and raise him.  I got a yes.  

Isaac was a hard baby.  He cried and fussed and didn't sleep and wanted to nurse 24/7 and he was exhausting.  He was spitty and he was crabby....and I mothered him every minute of every hour of every day.  Eventually he grew out of that stage and became a very brave and boistrous toddler and pre-schooler and I began to understand him a bit better.  Isaac is really smart.  He is also very sensitive and aware and fiercely attached....to me.  As I got to know him better over the years, I began to understand that he is very much like me...and like my brother and my father....and some of that is awesome and some of that is more challenging.  

I worried that Isaac wouldn't need people and wouldn't make friends but he did.  He made really good friends.  I worried he wouldn't get involved with activities but he did....he played football and baseball and found friends to spend time with on weekends.....he excelled at school and he didn't have to try very hard.  Every job he has had, he succeeded with and his employers always want him to come back.  The kid has a bright future.

Covid 19 has been brutal.  He was denied a finale to high school.  No prom. (he had a date even).  No classic graduation....just some make-shift version where we weren't even allowed a picture with him at the ceremony....and no final day of high school to leave the campus for the last time.  He just woke up one day and went to work as an 18 yr old kid and just kept working for 5 months until the powers that be said he could go to college.  He did get to do baseball.  We are grateful for that.  

So now he is at college and he doesn't live here anymore and that's really really strange.  The boys dorms are not air-conditioned and its 96 and humid here....and the guys are miserable.  Late afternoon he and his buddies came to swim and we shared our supper with them and told them to come back again and again....and he packed up the Wii game system because apparently the PS 4 isn't quite enough for right now.  Classes don't start until Tuesday.  I also may have gleaned some intel from his buddies that he may have a girlfriend....or is in the process of having one....and that's really exciting for me.  He is very private and not giving details so I need to keep his buddies coming 'round to get more info.  Tonight was pork loin....I will have to keep them coming with more meat and fresh rolls I think.  

Gosh I love this boy.  I think he knows....but if not I need to find ways to tell him.  I'm so proud of him.  I get him.  I know how hard it is because so much of me lives in him.  I was his age once and I was hell on fire.....and a hot mess....and he is so much like me and not any of that, really.  Oh.  Make no mistake.  He is naughty naughty naughty......but not angry and not like I was.....and so grace upon grace upon grace is for him....and his journey....and his divine plan from the Lord.  

God reminded me that the devil fights hard for the ones he doesn't want to achieve the plan ordained for Him.  I smiled.....Isaac will be fine.  I did my part.  His dad and I invested 100% of 18 years plus....and we cried and we prayed and we laughed and we yelled and we agonized and we waited and we smiled.  Now it's Isaac's turn to use what we gave him and to figure it out.   We get a front row seat and I couldn't be more pleased to watch and see all that the Lord will do in and through him.