JUST AS I AM - I Come Broken to Be Mended...

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Superbowl musings, Niki-style

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 Last week I walked dogs in unexpectedly warm late winter afternoons.  I realized that when I don't walk regularly it matters.  This week I wanted to walk again but I am such a wimp and if it is cold or windy or rainy or all of those things put together, I don't want to walk outside.  I spend my work days in and out and in and out and cold and warm and cold and warm.....but today I needed to walk.  It was cold and windy and rainy.   I started my walking app that tells me when to walk slow, speed up, slow down, speed up and eventually cool down.  In my home office space in front of a cooking competition.  I looked ridiculous walking in place, dancing and prancing, moving foward and backward and working up a sweat but I got it done.  I sure did.   I got groceries because we were out of milk and I got food for "superbowl Sunday" which is not that different from any other Sunday evening.  My parents come over and we have snack...
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some thoughts on fear and courage

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 We just returned from a volleyball competition in Kansas City.  These weekends of club volleyball are exciting and stressful, expensive and also costly in social and emotional currency.  Some moments gain and some moments lose in the account.  The recent article that circulated locally about why someone pulled his kids out of club volleyball was interesting to say the least.  What he didn't describe was the social and interpersonal and spiritual gain that are available by leaving town and spending time with people who don't look like you, think like you or care about the same things.....and how some of those moments are rich teaching moments between parents and children that would not be available if all we ever did was live, work and play with our local circle of peers.  I'm going to discipline myself to say no more on that topic.  I was fearful to even bring it up but I'm just tired enough tonight to feel a bit courageous as well.   My kid...
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a weekend to rest

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 Recently I had a conversation with a  mother about self care .  She has a newborn and 2 older kids and a partner and a job.  When I asked her about her self care she looked at me like I was crazy...She had no idea of how to come up with list of things she can do that will give her peace, rest and fill her emotional cup.  I'm guessing this is not uncommon because if someone doesn't practice self care, they would not have much of a list.  I have practiced.  I have a list and I know how to use it.   This weekend I was able to stay home and Roger and Precious went on to the volleyball tournament together.  JOsiah was sad because he wanted to go to Kentucky...it sounded glamorous...but I knew it would be 2 days in the car, 2 days in the volleyball arena and 2 days driving home.  I was already tired and feeling wiped out....I needed to clean my house and sit in my rocking chair and sleep in my bed with the window open and the fan blowing...
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